The Role Gender Plays in Africa

The past couple of days have gone smoothly. If you read this blog frequently then you most likely understand my daily and weekly routine. Unfortunately, there were no major stories or events that happened in the past days. That’s quite surprising really. I suppose it had to happen at least once before I left and so here my experience becomes somewhat calm in one of my final weeks.

I spent time in the clinic as well as at Saint Benedict’s Secondary School on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Today, Saturday, I’ll work on getting this posted to the internet and then head out for a nice walk. You know how much I like those and a Saturday afternoon is the perfect time for one. It’s a sunny 70 degree day here in Tanzania so it will be nice.

As I mentioned before there is nothing overly dramatic or wild happening here. I did attend the debate at Saint Benedict’s on Friday. However, it was canceled after a three hour wait. The debate was to be about whether or not the students felt bride price should be kept in society. Three schools instead of two would go about debating this topic. Unfortunately, but not very surprising, one school just never showed up. The other school strolled in two and a half hours late and appeared unfazed and acted as if they were right on time.

I get that time is relative and I am very aware that things are taken much slower and easier here in Africa. I know that now better than most. However, if there is one thing that will always stick with me it is timeliness. I went out to see if the other schools were coming and noticed the boys just meandering and slowly walking towards the school. I told them they were late and better get a move on. They looked at me with a confused expression on their face. Almost as if no one has ever called them out for being late. In fact, they may never have been.

Stampede the door!

Once one of the schools had arrived we all stayed in the large classroom for another half hour until enough time had passed for them to just go ahead and cancel the debate. It’s funny because they take forever to get an event going, but once it’s over the rush to get out mimics a stampede. Like I mentioned in my last post, everyone is budging and pushing to get out only to find that there is nothing to rush out for.

It was also a bummer to hear the debate was canceled because I thought the topic was quite interesting. Bride price is still very much a thing here in Tanzania and most likely much of Africa. You are able to see a very small piece of it in our Western society, but it is not as prominent as it is here. In America, the bride’s family may pay for the wedding (which is a tradition that I believe has gone by the way-side in recent years – I obviously have no idea, though) and there is no paying the parents of the bride for their daughter.

In Tanzania, a man will offer a price and negotiate with the parents of the woman he wants to marry. At least, in this society, he should. That is how it is done. If the price is right then the marriage may take place. I have heard of prices going in the hundreds of thousands to millions of schilling. Since women are not property, many people are finally seeing the problems in this and feel it should be abolished, but others find it a part of their tradition and culture.

A good debate for young students to have, unfortunately, due to lack of punctuality, they were unable to.

One of my students who likes to play Frisbee with me during sports time is Blandina (pronounced: Blan-dee-nah). Her sister Monica is a year younger, yet takes full control during these debates I have mentioned. Monica is a great debater and I always have to laugh because at every debate she is a main speaker while a large amount of girls never attempt at debating the topic.

Noticing this, I asked Blandina to take me to Monica so I can commend her confidence and debating skills. I mention this because it is so funny how they react.

“Monica, you do such a great job debating. I love your confidence.”

“Ah, don’t tell me. Don’t tell me. Really?”

“Yes, of course. I think you do a very good job in these debates.”

“Ah, you are kind. You think so? Thank you.”

I just have to laugh at the “Don’t tell me,” statement and questioning of my compliment.

Now that I have complimented them they want to make sure that their friends know. I spend my time at the Trade School on Wednesdays and so I don’t see my Saint Benedict students then. So, on Thursday I’ll show up and the girls will approach me and state rather than ask “Joseph, I know you missed me.” They state this after just whispering to their friends which I can only imagine is a conversation on how they can prove I missed them or like them better than the other girls.

I, of course, act as if I don’t see this secret conversation happening right in front of me and always say “yes, I missed you very much.” This causes a roar of laughter and many comments of “see, I told you he missed me.” It’s really funny. By the age of 23 I am well aware of all these sly (or what they think is sly) tactics by girls. It is funny seeing how obvious it all is now and comparing it back to my middle school days where I couldn’t figure any of it out.

Girls are confusing J

After the debate was canceled there was a football (soccer) match set up for Saint Benedict to face Corant, a boy’s school from the village. I haven’t mentioned Corant much because I have only been there once and because it sits far back in the village. This was an exciting moment for all the students. They boys rolled up in these dala dala (Tanzanian mini-bus taxis) with the music roaring and a good portion of the boys hanging out the windows. They all filed out and got ready for the match. There is one form (grade) of boys at Saint Benedict even though it is a girl school. The boys played football and the girls faced off in netball. Netball being a game that uses a basketball rim with no net.

The boys showing up for the match.

I asked the girls if they could play football if they wanted and they said they could, but never do. It’s primarily a boy sport and netball a girls. It is evident gender roles are still very much a thing in African society.

The match ended in a tie. 1-1. Football (soccer) is called the ‘noble sport’ for being one of the only sports that allows for a match to end in a tie.

On Thursday an older woman from Germany, Casty, arrived for a short visit. I did not know she was coming. She is 67 and is a retired pharmacist. She is volunteering through Pharmacies without Borders. I swear, there are so many ‘… without borders’ programs nowadays. Doctors without Borders, Pharmacies without Borders, Students without Borders, Students without Frontiers. I’m surprised there isn’t Garbage Men without Borders. Hey, that would actually be a good idea. There is such a big problem with litter and garbage disposal here that they could use a hand with that.

I think these programs are wonderful, but had no idea there were so many. Anyway, Casty is here for the next two weeks. I am still king of my small rundown guesthouse over here. She lives next to Christa in the new guesthouse built in the last year or two. Being 67, she has many stories about her children and seeing that I tend to be the only one around able to speak English and willing to listen I hear lots about them. She has a daughter in Seattle, a son in Cape Town and her husband back in southern Germany. Casty has a very vibrant personality which leads to long conversations.

I have helped connect her phone and tablet to the internet, however somehow her tablet continuously disconnects. She contacted her son who told her to buy a router just for the tablet. After hearing this I just said, “Your son has come up with a wonderful first-world solution to this problem.” This was not meant to be mean, just honest. I have no idea where you are going to find a router, where you’ll be able to connect it and what internet source you’ll use. There is no way the connection and strength of the Trade School is strong enough for another router and it would be pretty unfair to all the other people trying to use it. I have given her the password required for the internet so hopefully she can reenter it.

Having lived in Africa for a long period of time now a number of my things are beginning to fall apart. Random things like my watch band and a small piece of my phone case (a flap that covers the speakers at the bottom) have randomly fallen off. Once I notice it I think to myself “out of everything, how does that break?” Anyway, I have been able to find super glue at the local shop. Who would have thought they would have super glue? It works like a charm, though. I’m a big fan of super glue. Works on practically everything and holds for a long time. Repair job complete.

I have heard the sad news of the death of music legend and icon, Prince. It’s sad to lose such a huge Minnesota rock star at the age of 57. The old TV with one channel that sits in the guest refectory is able to pick up BBC for one hour each morning and the press coverage of his death is enormous, President Obama and other celebrities chiming in. It’s also crazy to see downtown Minneapolis on the TV here.

*A very BIG Happy Birthday to my brother, Thomas. 27 years old and making the most out of life. It’s great to see. Thanks for being such a great role model and older brother. I look forward to seeing you a little more this year. I will try to visit the Air Force base in June.

Thanks for reading!